August 6^th

 

Last entry

 

Today is the commemoration of 70 years of Hiroshima and Nagasaki, a disaster that I hope will never be done again. I feel the weight all day long. I am sure my parents feel it as well and the friends I meet today.  A sunny hot day in Bamberg. A friend of study times in Bamberg who is a vivid hobby gardener and I are watering apple trees and I admire here plot in the intercultural garden. The project is at the Regnitz River 20 minutes from the city center on the compound of a yarn factory where I did a work study 30 years ago cutting string of spindles 8 hours of day in shifts and learn and write about the workers who were working there decades. For lunch I stroll to the Rose garden, meeting my spiritual mentor Anne from 25 years ago from my theology times, a lively, warm hearted and open minded professional and simply a good mensch. She made church for many people a better place. We are talking about the possibility to offer Feldenkrais for clerical personal. I would be delighted to return to the place of my first intense studies and inner journeys, to work with persons on their awareness, balance, physical movement habits with the joy, playfulness and gentleness of this approach! For the tea hour in the afternoon I am invited at my Biblical literature professor, where I wrote my first thesis about feminist biblical approaches (of 182 pages!) and who trained me in critical and systematic thinking. It is great to have talks about biblical literature and research, an area that was once so important for me – my life took me quite a bit away from that activity. But when I think about it: therapeutic evaluations and looking for essence is still my daily occupation!

 

 

 

 

 

Sitting by my holy linden tree, a last visit before I leave Germany again. Sunset in full colors.

I am sad to leave the area. The same time thankful. 3 months sabbatical. What will the future be?

I made connections to work with Feldenkrais also in Germany. But now a start in the US is the next step.

I wanted unlearn hectic and narrow approach of rehabilitation and make place for variation, play, heart connections, grounding myself. An ongoing learning process.

 

 

 

 

 

For you in the Prince Georges Park/Maryland USA area, our open house for my Movement Clinic is on September 20 th.

Address:

 7100 Baltimore Avenue Suite 207, College Park. If you can, come!

For you who “travelled with me” on the blog in Europe and we have shared hours or days with each

August 5^th

One last hike in the hills of the Fraenkische Schweiz. A lovely path by the river Wiesent, the same starting point as 2 months ago, at my 50. birthday. This time we walk in the opposite direction. The mood with my parents is heavy, maybe the upcoming good bye. It is good to be in nature, always a place where my mother and father can be, even if life is hard.

At the end of the tour, my father shows me a natural wonder, the “Riesenburg” (Castle for Giants), a cave that lost its cover some millions of years ago and is a real spectacular place to be. If I ever have a chance to be with you in this area, we will go there!

 

 

 

 

August 4^th

 

Before I return for the last days on this trip to my parents, I visit for two days with a dear soul friend: Ghislana lives as an artist, and down to earth spiritual nature educator in small village between a forest and lake. We walk through the forest to the local elementary school and water the school garden, one educational project of Ghislana where children have class outside and learn about their environment by doing, touching, and listening.

 

 We also sit in her gorgeous garden and go swim in the lake. I so much enjoy a slow rhythm, talks where we inspired each other with associations, walks through the Southern Brandenburg forest (south of Berlin, an area with lots of sandy earth from the ice-age), meals from garden harvests, delicious swims in the “Long Lake” and hours where both of us worked peacefully. We also start planning for a seminar together with Feldenkrais and nature experience. Stay posted if you ever thought to go to the area South of Berlin!

This early morning I stood by the lake, no boats yet, just air and water, trees and birds and I watched the fish, coming to the surface and creating little circles in the water. One circle, then another one, touching the first one, overlapping, creating new forms, the next one, the first ones becoming wider and wider until they dissolved in the lake. Short-lasting beauty but also forever re-creating. I felt great peace about life with its losses, changes, new beginnings. We cannot hold it, we better flow with it…

 

By the way: Ghislanas blog is public and can be seen under http://jahreszeitenbriefe.blogspot.com/

 

August 1^st

This week in this Sabbatical, I joined my godchild Noah, his family for their first week of family vacation at the “Darss” at the Baltic See (Ostsee). A week camping in a very comfortable tent with a sleeping and living section near “one of 20^th nicest beaches of the world”! It was a week of severe storms, rain and cold and I made good use of all my clothes. “My family” gave me a second blanket, a thermos with hot water and the obligatory warm water bottle for cozy nights. In the mornings, I swam for 20 minutes even in the rain, enjoyed being carried by the waves and afterwards a hot shower and most of the days warm family hours with wonderful Noah, his smart and charming sister and their two moms. It is a challenge to be close to a family but still the 5^th person on board. The same time everyone did her and his best to build connections and spend quality time together. I would say to live family let it be social or biological, always touches deep stuff, and for sure I did for me: belonging, connections, being seen and heard, communication, safety….

 

 

 

 

 

On my last day the sun came out. Beautiful…!

 

July 24th

Three weeks travelling into my own biography part 4

Have you ever gone through 15 boxes of your former library, letters from 15 years, photos and slides and need to decide what you can take and what you have to say goodbye to in week? It is a journey in literature that meant so much to me, a library of novels, poems, professional books, art. Pictures of beloved landscapes and people who were dear and important and I took so many pictures and we wrote letters. And today: it is in my heart and biography but the material has to go.

It is a cleansing act and an astonishing trip to the local recycling center: I am standing with my goods that found no place in second hand shops, charity stores, public bookshelves, friends… at a place with at least 20 different containers with recycling goods. The local garbage depot is now called Depot for recycling goods. I am impressed and confident that my material will become something different. My respect!

July 22nd

 

Three weeks travelling into my own biography part 3

 

The local outdoor swimming pool where I always had a seasonal ticket. I had a sweetheart for whom I was waiting. Would he come today? Would he look at me when I swam? And would we go for a walk after the swim?? I had bought from my pocket money a heavenly smelling lilac soap that I used for the shower after the swim. Even today, 35 years later, I know a few people who still go for their daily swim. We greet each other with respect after I introduced myself to one or two. With others we greet each other with the group smile of the morning swimmers.  At home in Brentwood, I am a morning swimmer as well, in our local community pool. Where ever there is a possibility to swim in the morning before breakfast, I am in!  Here in Herzogenaurach is no special morning swim time and serious swimmers met the people who want a social hour and doing exercises. It is good to be early and I got a lane either under the 3 meter jumping board (closed in the morning) or in the children section on the right side. A pleasant routine in a place where I am a guest and need to adjust to my hosts, parents who live a very tight schedule that gives them security. I try very hard to be a good guest, knowing that my presence means a lot but is also a challenge to their routine. I see my struggles to find my place and their struggles to be good parents with their own wounds and limitations. It is good to have this time with them.

 

July 20th

 

Three weeks travelling into my own biography part 2

My high school was at the other side of town and I biked at least 25 minutes one way. One hill down, one hill up. Inner town school buses were rare 40 years ago, as were helmets! We completed a road exam in our 4^th grade and off we were on the roads. How different is that in the US where it is forbidden that kids even take care of their younger siblings under the age of 14.

In front of our school were in the 1980s often groups of strange people who distributed flyers with “the lie of Holocaust” on it. There were banned for a kilometer around the school but got their paper anyway. I wanted to know a lot and also what that was. Our school reacted with a project week for the 10 and 11^th grade. In various subjects we learned about the preparation of the Nazi regime and the 12 years of dictatorship and the Holocaust. I do recall us three preparing a presentation about the “women in the 1930s to the begin of the Nazi time”, meeting in each other homes and finding out how to organize and present the material. We copied a brochure for all the classmates and were proud. 1982 we went to the Herzo Base (the US American military base, a remainder of the 4 sector occupation after WW II, in our area the US troops. We also fought for the ban of the right wing extremist party (the communist one was forbidden), a still ongoing topic on Germany.

Last week my former teacher, now a dear friend, and I strolled through my high school from 1978-1984 today part of a school center. Several school gardens (they even won a price for beauty and diversity of their garden!) taken care by students and my teacher, a beautiful cafeteria I only could have dreamed of in my times where school days until 1 or 2pm even in high-school were common practice.